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© Scott White

A notebook of notably noteworthy and sometimes notorious notes, thoughts and pontifications.

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I Want To Live Life Backwards Next Time

By Scott

Remix from George Carlin –

I want to live my next life backwards.

You start out dead and get that out of the way.

Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day.

Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.  Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.

Then you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.  You work 40 years until you’re too young to work.

You get ready for High School:  drink alcohol, party and you’re generally promiscuous.

Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play and you have no responsibilities.

Then you become a baby, and then…  you spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in spa-like conditions – central heating, room service on tap, and then…

You finish off as an orgasm.

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